– Julie Delpy
Every week, I receive email from women asking… How can I get my man to spend more time with me? How can I get the man I’m dating to ask me out more often? How can I get my husband to pay more attention to me?
Each woman is different. Each situation is different. There are many factors underneath. So there is no one-size-fits-all answer. Anyone who tells you that is lying. (Yes, I said it!)
However, a lot of that drama stems from a basic need of men world-wide. When men mention these 3 little words, women world-wide panic and get nervous.
“I need space.”
In my early twenties, those words caused me great anxiety.
I would cling tighter. Ask what was wrong. Push and pressure. Demand we spend more time together.
Deep down inside, I simply did not feel complete. I did not have the self-worth to love my own company.
Then I discovered a secret during a 3-month escapade adventuring through Europe.
It was an exhilarating time in my life. I discovered the pleasure of being in my own company.
As I said before, it wasn’t always this way.
If we’re all honest with ourselves, there were times in our lives when we felt lonely. We went on dates because we didn’t want to stay home—alone. We lost ourselves in relationships because it made us feel “better, valued or wanted.”
We did not love our own company.
One of the best things women can do to add to their mystique, poise and magnetism is to create a Lady Boudoir. But not just create it, but make spending time there a habit.
When you do, you will get to a point when you can say this Warsan Sire quote:
This is the key to being the high value woman who is poised, magnetic and highly attractive.
In love, work and life.
Let me be CRYSTAL CLEAR, you are doing this for YOURSELF, not a man.
Creating A Lady Boudoir”
A few questions to ask yourself…
- What makes you feel feminine?
- What brings out the best in you?
- What draws out your power?
- What makes you feel like a woman?
- What soothes your soul?
- What would you like to do alone–if you had more time?
Answer these questions. Ask even more questions. Once you get to know yourself, creating the perfect Lady Boudior will be easy. Any woman can have this private, sacred space. You can use a spare room or your bedroom. Choose a space that fits your desires.
Creating an opulent environment that will arouse your senses. Want a few ideas?
Surround yourself with colors that make you feel luxurious, warm and comforted. Select artwork that makes your soul come alive. A lively bouquet of your favorite fresh flowers adds a touch of nature to your boudoir. Anything that will please you visually.
Beautiful scented candles. A gorgeous sweet-smelling bouquet of flowers. Intoxicating incense. Luckily, you have so much to choose from today.
Serenade yourself. There is nothing like music to soothe the soul or fire you up. Sometimes, I catch myself going for days without listening to music. This has a huge impact on my spirit, energy and productivity. Create a playlist for your lady boudoir.
Here are 3 of my favorites:
Tina Turner “In Your Wildest Dreams”
Luca LaStilla “Briciole Sulla Pelle”
Wax Tailor “Seize The Day”
Find pillows and throws with materials that feel smooth, plush or have a lovely texture to the touch. This is often overlooked and can really heighten the experience.
Tantalize those taste buds. It doesn’t have to be decadent. You can arrange a small plate of your favorite sliced fresh fruit and quality cheeses. Chocolate lovers can add a couple pieces of fine chocolate. Greek yogurt with honey, raisins and walnuts is one a personal favorite.
Why not become a high value woman and live life sensually?
After this became a ritual in my life, I remember a man I was dating years ago commented, “Rhonda, you need your time?! You’re like a man.”
I said, “No. I’m very much a lady. And a lady needs her time.”
He knew that I did not need the pleasure of his company—I enjoyed it.Now that, my high value woman, is living in your power.
(By the way, he wanted to spend more time with me—wink!)
Go create your Lady Boudoir.
Lock the door.
Shut the world out.
After all, you are The High Value Woman.
Until next time…